Are you going at this weight loss journey alone?…
What to do when there’s no support?…
Do you feel like you are alone in your weight loss journey?…
What to do when everyone around you wants to eat cake?!…
Deciding and committing to being a healthier you can be quite exhilarating and frightening at the same time. What can be worse is if you don’t have supportive friends or family members that “get” why you are trying to lose weight.
It can be really challenging to stick to your fitness goals when your spouse brings home your favorite doughnuts or when your friends make comments that you are no fun anymore because you have given up drinking or don’t want to eat out all the time.
There is something called the “Crab Effect”. If you put a bunch of crabs in a pot, one will try to climb out and try to escape. The rest of the crabs at the bottom will pull the escaping crab back down into the pot.
Most people do not like change (expect for those that want the most out of their lives). Your spouse enjoys “making you happy” by bringing home your favorite dessert. Your friends enjoy the “great times” you have at the local bar. And by not conforming to what they want you to do (eat the doughnuts or go hang at the local pub), in their eyes you are basically telling them you don’t enjoy the same things you once did. They may be concerned that your relationship with them is changing and they might lose you if you change. They may not be okay with that and they may try to bring you back down into the pot with the other crabs.
I am not saying they are trying deliberately to sabotage your efforts. They may be telling you things like “you don’t need to lose weight” or “one drink isn’t gonna matter”. But this is your life and not theirs.
So how do you overcome “friendly sabotagers”?
Depending on how attached you are to the situation…like how badly do YOU want to eat those doughnuts or how badly do you want to have a drink…will determine how you react in situations like these.
Here are some suggestions:
Make sure you are really on board with your fat loss journey. You have to be 100% committed to reaching your fitness goals so that you can hurdle over ANY obstacle in your way.
Accept the fact that people are going to say things to you and may try to derail your efforts (again this may not be meant in a mean way).
Envision yourself reaching your fitness goals. How do you feel? What do you look like? What types of clothes do you wear? How do you eat? What does a typical day look like for you as a new fit, healthy person? The clearer the picture you have of your healthy life the easier it will be to pass on temptations and peer pressure.
You do not have to defend your decisions. If someone makes a comment, politely say “I will take that into consideration but for now this is what I am choosing to do to better my life” or something along those lines.
If you DO have a supportive group of friends and/or family, cherish it.
Sadly, not many people do.
This is a key element to achieving your fitness goals. At Shape It Up (SIU), I incorporate not only personal support from me but also fellow peers which is why the SIU Inner Circle exists. This private group of SIU clients can speak freely and openly about struggles, challenges and successes in a supportive non-threatening environment. Wouldn’t you like to be able to share your thoughts with like-minded individuals?
…What I don’t understand is why the crabs don’t boost up the crab that’s trying to escape? Once
that crab is at the top, couldn’t it easily clip onto the next crab and eventually pull everyone out?
You may not be able to save any of the crabs in your pot but when they see your physical changes over time, you may be able to pull a few out with you.
Here’s to fighting and winning against other crabs!